it is about time

I am still in the battle-
in January I had radiation for the secondary cancer
to hold it back from spreading into my collar bone-
it did help

this week I have a pet scan to see if they can find the primary
cancer and then see if they can treat it-

the chemo did so much damage that now it is too dangerous to try
again for some time

I am weak and tired from the body fighting the cancer that we
cannot find- sigh
I seldom come to the computer and it took me a while to remember
my password or even where to find it-
so much of my life has slowed down now
i send hugs and love with prayers - Meme

dear friends

I have been in the hospital since November the 10 and finally came home today- I had a severe chemo crash and also a infected bowel caused by the chemo and came very close to going home to the Lord but He choose to heal me slowly- I am a miracle patient as they were not expecting me to live past the first day and called my family in- but God did not take me home yet- I am very weak and was very sick but as my platelets dropped to poing 6 which is not a good thing and also having the infection and nothing to fight it with- They had a new cancer drug they brought in to use and God used the drug as a miracle-
I will write more when I can and I will try to find a way for Miss Ashley to write here for me=
I was too sick to explain to her how to find the blog - I am just blessed to be able to tell you this in person- life is very different for me now as I need to be cared for rather than be a care giver
this cancer is fighting my body and taking a lot out of me but God will decide and His plans are best for me although I do not really like them at the moment
I will update when I can- I spent 42 days in the hospital so I am just finding my blogs again-
thanks for praying and please continue-
love Meme

I am ok ---chemo

here I am full of medicine and chemo but I am ok-- very tired! Nurse Crash-it is doing a good job aka Miss Ashley=I just came in to say hello and good night and with hugs and prayers.


from Meme

chemo is coming........

I have my first chemo treatment on Oct-28 Wednesday- at 9:30 a.m.
I will update more tomorrow-5 sleeps to go-- I hope I can rest the night before- I am happy to know I have a date now but also very anxious.
hugs from Meme

yesterday's cancer news

today was very long and tiring - and the news is rough.
I have cell cancer in the lining of my stomach and it is not the good type
-they can treat me but there is no cure as it is the same cancer that David had except it is in my lining of stomach rather than pancreas.
I will begin treatments soon. I have to have a colonoscopy on Friday to determine it it has spread to the bowel. oh yuck--LOL
It did not show on the ct scan re bowel but he said the scan can not always pick up cell cancer there so the colonoscopy.
I am very tired and exhausted and just shell shocked but I will be better tomorrow,sigh.
I have not sent any thing to anyone else yet( I have now as I am a day late here)
but it is fine to share and I will up date as I can- as long as folks realize this is really all i know and that next week I will get the port put in and I cannot individually reply right now--it is going to be a tough battle to get me into remission but I have hope and faith in the decision we made today.

in memory of papa---blessing

today 2 of his friends came with trucks and cleaned up my back yard of things that were done and also cleaned out an entire shed so that I have a whole unit to store things so that I can continue to down size and if I am not sure I can still remove from the house-
I was so blessed== also can put all the thrift store stuff until they come back and they will take it down for me-this is like having a whole new room added to my house-they took an old chair and dresser and hamper from the house for me too - which adds more space for me they did it in memory of papa and in honor of meI am so blessed--I was able to share some of papa hubbys things with them- R------has a whole load of wood for their wood burning stove as papa hubby had a lot of willow saved up for his canes he made--they tried to pay me and so I tried to pay them-- and we both agreed that this is what friendship is for--and so we both won each other over -
I am ok --- will write soon- huggles me, Meme

ct scan done :-)

the scan and the day went smoothly- hoping the results will be in by Friday but not for sure.
I go to the city hospital but they still have to be read and sent to another cancer clinic for further reading--so I am being a patient waiting patient but the good news is that I have my first appointment on October 13 at the cancer clinic so I will begin my journey then-I had a good day and was able to get the kitchen back to my standards which is two clean sinks so just being able to do that makes me feel better-I just puttered and rested etc-forgive me for times between updates but I have to try to rest and take things easy and even phone calls and emailing is tiring on some days- I am learning what balance is...........I love you guys and know that you are holding us up in prayer- that is the greatest blessing of all.

huggles from Meme

Dogman with papa

Dogman has been sick off and on with his Cushings and the last two days were too much for him
and his kidney's stopped filtering the water he was drinking which meant his blood was getting no water and I
took him to the vet but there was nothing she could do but gently send him to papa hubby- He was so weak
and just went to sleep with a calming drug - she knew he was dying so we sat in a special room togetherand he slipped away-He seemed content to be with me - He would have been 13 tomorrow- he is being cremated privately and will come back to us in a pretty cedar box- with his name on and '' thanks for the memories.'' I am ok as ok is for me right now
and my little bird was bit by a bee and died 15 minutes afterwards so today is not a good day here=
huggles me who has a sadder heart tonight-